Month: October 2008

Something Quirky This Way Comes.

I’ve always been a right weirdo and proud of it. In any case, stith-gaaru has tagged me to actually elaborate on my weirdo-ness,  so without much ado, here goes:

1. I count everything. And I have to have it down in even numbers. I cannot stand odd numbers other than 5.  My obsession with even numbers even makes me buy stuff that way. When I’m eating Kit-Kat, I cannot eat just one segment and leave the other three. I have to have two or I finish the whole thing. Hell, even when I sevichufy (prostrate, for all you non-tamils) I do it in even numbers. If I’m timing something and I finish it, I make sure I press “end timer” ONLY when its on 0 or a 5. This is one of the reasons I enter panic mode if any of my problems (accounts/costing/math) don’t have a perfect answer and come in decimals. I sit and rework the entire problem in order to convince myself that I did do it right.

2. I have this commentary running in my head throughout. Its this weird voice talking about everything around me, with me. When the voice switches on (which is pretty much most of the time), I switch off, or space out. I’m pretty much in head’s little talk show most of the time. And the inner voice person is really funny too. Which is why lots of people catch me sitting with a smug smile in my face for no apparent reason.
Sometimes I’m spaced out for days.

3. When I wake up, I stare at the ceiling fan for 5 full minutes. And see it spin. Somehow my day doesn’t start right if I don’t do the staring thing. It’s where I get to contemplate about the things that I should have said, shouldn’t have said, should have said but didn’t, shouldn’t have said but did, should never say but invariably end up saying, should always say but never, and yea, you get the picture. 

4. I don’t store data in my head. I store media. I take pictures. I direct commercials, music videos and movies. I can write entire screenplays off little incidents in my life. And somehow, I remember the stupidest of details, even the impossibly minute ones. Let me remind you that the incredible memory works only when I’m not spaced out. When I’m in my own world, there could be a giant billboard on Mount Road proclaiming me to be the Royal Queen of England and I wouldn’t have noticed.

5. When people are upset, they do a lot of things to get it out of their system. Some write it out, some scream it out. I sleep it out. If I’m upset about something, the first thing I do is go to bed. And sleep. Life automatically becomes enjoyable when you close your eyes.

6. I cannot stand partially closed doors or windows. It has to be fully closed or fully open. This almost closed/open business irritates the hell out of me. I go out of my way to make sure the door is closed because otherwise I get distracted and jittery. 

These are only 6 quirks of course. I have plenty more, and I’m still discovering!
And you’re up to take the tag. It’s plenty fun.

Reality Check

My telephone bill this month is Rs.204.50.
Take out the mandatory rental (inclusive of service tax) we are left with a grand total of Rs.3.

I think this explains the state of my “social” life to a great extent.
3 bucks phone usage.

More than me, I feel sorry for Airtel. They must be wondering where all their business disappeared.

My Excuse for a Post

I had a crush on Brett Lee for 4 years. But now I know where his heart really is.
Why, Brett, WHY?

Sigh. This always happens with all the boys I like.

UPDATE: The video is no longer working because BCCI has some copyright issues. 
Anyhow, the above video, a charming display of male affection goes like this: 
Ishant Sharma, the tall, long-haired charmer runs up the pitch, the opposite end 
of which the unbelievably good looking Brett Lee stands. As he looks at the golden
haired, light eyed chunk-a-hunk his heart skips several beats, his hand becomes
unexplainably sweaty which makes him lose his grip on the ball and his delivery ends up as
a short pitched bouncer which hits Brett on his shoulder and makes him fall 

(in slow motion, courtesy action replay). Ishant is horrified, of course. He didn’t 
mean to hurt the man who had just caused butterflies to somersault in his heart. 
He stares, not knowing what to do. Brett looks at him. There is an instant 
connection, for their hearts share the same thoughts. He flashes his disarming 
smile and blows a kiss in Ishant’s direction.
Mmmmmuah!

Ok so I might have exaggerated a little bit.

Hindi not coming

Saying that my hindi is not good wouldn’t be right. But it wouldn’t be wrong either.
I’m telling this because my hindi accent is perfect, but my grammar is a different story altogether. I’m not very strong in my tenses so i end up swallowing the last part of all my sentences. But then again, thanks to my perfect accent, people would listen to me rather than my colleague who had studied hindi das kaksha thak cause he said “awur” for “aur” which obviously qualified him for automatic unselection.
My hindi< i will be honest is only fit for haggling with the shopkeepers of Linking road and Colaba. And fair enough, I wasn’t too bothered about it.
However when I was in Bombay the last week, I was strangely determined to take my hindi from the “bhaiyya iska price kya hai/woh redwalla piece chaahiye” to a whole new level. So in pursuit of shudh-hindi I decided the only way would be to interact with the bank staff with my crap hindi.
It was an interesting experience, thanks to relentless efforts in talking my unique brand of hindi the employees of the bank got inspired and started talking to me in their unique english.
One would think that this was hint enough to limit my hindi to the shopkeepers instead of making the bank employees’ ears bleed, but no, this inspired me to take my hindi to greater heights, namely the 5th floor (investments cell).
I had to find out a couple of issues regarding the bank’s investments for that quarter, a few matters regarding money at call and short notice, term deposits in other banks, the lot. The man who was in charge of it seemed hindi enough so I decided once again to execute my lingual prowess (or the lack of it)
Two sentences into the conversation, he had figured out what my standard of hindi was and after answering the first 3 questions in the same language he switched over to english. But me? Mein sirf hindi mein baath karthi thi. I didn’t care about the wry smile on his face whenever I messed up with the genders and the “ka-ki-ke“s. I was on a mission. At the end of the session, his wry smile had turned into a full blown grin.
I got up – “thank you ji”
“What’s your good name, madam?”
I told him exactly what it was.
“You’re from Madras?”
“Haan ji” I said, in a way that would have made Amitabh Bachchan proud.
That guy starts laughing. Just when I’m about to ask him what he found so amusing, he says, “Madam, naanum tamil dhaan.”

My school of hindi:

Vroom!

Unleashed on the roads of Chennai – the lean, mean, denting machine : the chutneymobile!

Let’s go (ruin everyone else’s peace of mind) in an Alto!

Actually speaking, the clutch sucks! it’s like driving a damn truck. 😐 But whatever, its MY gaadi! 😀 Mine!
Update: Many thanks to mr.chokkathangam. 😀

When golu bommais attack

Happy Navarathri ! And before I forget, all of you are very cordially invited to our family’s golu (featured above). Sundal and onion/cauliflower pakoras made fresh everyday. However, you will be given the aforementioned in excess quantity if you sing/dance or are incredibly cute. Please to come 😀

Also, some highly pissing off image kinks with blogger.  Some pictures aren’t turning out clear. The only solution which is available to me right now is clicking on it.